After receiving a 911 call, a local county sheriffs department attended a scene where a pedestrian was struck by a train. The pedestrian’s body parts are strewn along the tracks and deputies had to gather the body parts.
Three dead bodies turn up at suddenly the mortuary, all with very big smiles on their faces. The coroner calls his friend who happens to be the police chief to tell him he is going to be be late for their drinks night.
Two Virginia rednecks Willy and Eli go on a long weekend fishing trip. They rent a whole ton of equipment to pursue the activity for that period.
Tell brother Walt & Brother Elmer the Marine Corps beats working for old man DeHaan by a mile
10. I’m gonna pump you full o’ lead.
The clock starts, the men are thinking, after about 30 seconds the Law student jumps up and says………
A mother was walking down the hall when she heard a humming sound coming from her daughters bedroom.
Wal-Mart announced that they will soon be offering a new discount item, Wal-Mart’s own wine. Wine connoisseurs may not be inclined to throw a bottle of Wal-Mart brand into their shopping carts, but “there IS a market for cheap wine”
You could remove dried paint from your driveway, They had to rush in more beer when they saw the look on my face.
Never take a beer to a job interview, Always offer to bait your date’s hook, especially on the first date.
More reasons why you might be A Redneck if, You think safe sex is when the participants are married to each other.
Tell tale signs your’e a redneck, Directions to your house include, “turn off the paved road, Your Uncle Bob died peeing on an electric fence.
If the bumper sticker on your truck says, “My other computer is a laptop.
However, after several successful predictions, the woman didn’t show up for two weeks.
young and beautiful woman gets into the elevator, smelling of expensive perfume.
Told him to give Jesus an Irish whiskey, too.
As a language, is taught in all southern schools. Here are excerpts from the Hickphonic English dictionary:
The next week they tried again. When they went to pay, the attendant told them to pick a number. Two! said the second man. Sorry, it’s three, said the attendant, come back and try again.
A Northern fairytale begins, once upon a time.
Well, the next thing you know there’s a Ginsu by his side,
And Lorena’s in the car takin’ Willie for a ride.