A Wife texts her husband on a cold winter morning, “Windows frozen, won’t open.”
Technology Archive
Frozen Windows
Posted January 23, 2019 By AdminThe Text message.
Posted August 8, 2018 By AdminHi, Fred, this is Richard, next door.
I’ve got a confession to make. I’ve been riddled with guilt for a few months & have been trying to get up the courage to tell you face to face. I’m telling you in this text, & I can’t live with myself a minute longer without your knowing about this.
The truth is that, when you’re not around, I’ve been sharing your wife, day & night.
Super health computer.
Posted November 1, 2014 By AdminOne day Bill complained to his friend Chuck that his elbow really hurt. His friend Chuck suggested that a computer at the health centre that can diagnose anything quicker and cheaper than a doctor. “Simply put in a sample of your urine and the computer will diagnose your problem and tell you what you can do about it. It only costs $10.”
Bill being a tight bastard, figured he had nothing to lose, so he filled a jar with……..
SMS Text from a Romantic Wife
Posted July 21, 2014 By AdminA wife being the romantic sort, sent her husband a text.
“If you are sleeping, send me your dreams.
If you are laughing, send me your smile.”…………….
Core code for M$ OS’s
Posted February 27, 2012 By Admindisplay_copyright_message(); display_bill_rules_message(); do_nothing_loop(); if (first_time_installation) {make_50_gigabyte_swapfile();
Filed in Technology
What would have been different if Bill Gates was a Redneck.
Posted March 10, 2004 By AdminNew Shutdown wav: Y’all come back now, Yah hear?
Filed in Rednecks, Technology
How many internet mail list subscribers does it take to change a light bulb?
Posted March 10, 2004 By AdminHow many internet mail list subscribers does it take to change a light bulb?
Filed in Information, Technology
Emoticons.
Posted March 10, 2004 By AdminWe all know those cute little computer symbols called “emoticons,” where: 🙂 means a smile and 🙁 is a frown. It is little known that there are also some “emoticons” called “Assicons, here are the most common.
Filed in Technology
Hell of an Email.
Posted March 10, 2004 By AdminA business man and his business wife left the snow in Canada for a vacation in Florida, unavoidably his wife was bound by a business trip and was planning to meet him there the next day. When he reached his hotel, he decided to send his wife a quick email from his Laptop. Unfortunately, when […]
Engineers.
Posted March 10, 2004 By AdminPeople who work in the fields of science and technology are not like other people. This can be frustrating to the non-technical people who have to deal with them. The secret to coping with technology-oriented people is to understand their motivations. This chapter will teach you everything you need to know. I learned their customs […]
Filed in Technology
Why the Internet Is Like a Penis.
Posted March 10, 2004 By AdminIt can be up or down. It’s more fun when it’s up, but that makes it difficult to get any real work done. In the long-distant past, its only purpose was to transmit information considered vital to the survival of the species.
Filed in Technology
Virus Alert.
Posted March 10, 2004 By AdminSome common Computer Viruses to look out for. CLINTON VIRUS, TITANTIC VIRUS, GARY GLITTER VIRUS, ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER VIRUS.
Filed in Technology
Winders 2000.
Posted March 10, 2004 By AdminIt has come to our attention that a few copies of the WINDOWS 2000 ARKANSAS EDITION may have accidentally been shipped outside of the state of Arkansas. If you have one of these, you may need some help understanding the commands.
Filed in Technology
A Super Computer.
Posted March 10, 2004 By AdminA major computer company called IBEmmy held a large exhibitionof their latest Supercomputer, all the press, computer manufacturers, and software houses attended, and all the big names were there.
Filed in Technology
If restaurants functioned like Micro$oft
Posted March 8, 2004 By AdminIf restaurants functioned like Microsoft.
Filed in Food & Drink, Technology
Computer Acronyms Explained.
Posted March 8, 2004 By AdminMost Intelligent Customers Realise Our Software Only Fools Teenagers
Filed in Technology
Shoot yourself in the foot.
Posted March 8, 2004 By AdminYou shoot yourself in each toe, iteratively, until you run out of toes, then you read in the next foot and repeat.
Filed in Technology
10 reasons why your computer may be Possessed!
Posted March 8, 2004 By AdminInstead of flying appliances, your screen saver shows horned demons torturing your immediate family.
Filed in Technology
No Smoke without Micro$oft.
Posted March 8, 2004 By AdminJust add the line LOAD NOSMOKE.COM at the end of the CONFIG.SYS.
Filed in Technology
Alimentary Connections
Posted February 8, 2004 By AdminFearing the worst given the rough clientel, the Barman goes into the men’s room.
Filed in Technology