If restaurants functioned like Micro$oft

Customer: “Waiter!”
Waiter: “Hi, my name is Bill and I’ll be your Support Waiter. What seems to be the problem?”

Customer: “There’s a fly in my soup!”
Waiter: “Try again, maybe the fly won’t be there this time.”

Customer:” No, it’s still there.”
Waiter: “Maybe it’s the way you’re using the soup; try eating it with a fork instead.”

Customer: “Even when I use the fork, the fly is still there.”
Waiter: “Maybe the soup is incompatible with the bowl; what kind of bowl are you using?”

Customer: “A SOUP bowl!”
Waiter: “Hmmm, that should work. Maybe it’s a configuration problem; how was the bowl set up?”

Customer: “You brought it to me on a saucer; what has that to do with the fly in my soup?”
Waiter: “Can you remember everything you did before you noticed the fly in your soup?”

Customer: “I sat down and ordered the Soup of the Day!”
Waiter: “Have you considered upgrading to the latest Soup of the Day?”

Customer: “You have more than one Soup of the Day each day?”
Waiter: “Yes, the Soup of the Day is changed every hour.”

Customer: “Well, what is the Soup of the Day now?
Waiter: The current Soup of the Day is tomato.”

Customer: “Fine. Bring me the tomato soup and the Bill. I’m running late now.”
Waiter “leaves and returns with another bowl of soup and the Bill.”
Waiter: “Here you are, Sir. The soup and your Bill.”

Customer: “This is potato soup.
Waiter: Yes, the tomato soup wasn’t ready yet.”

Customer: “Well, I’m so hungry now, I’ll eat anything.
Waiter leaves.]”

Customer “Waiter! There’s a gnat in my soup!”

The Bill
Soup of the Day . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  £5.00
Upgrade to newer Soup of the Day . . . . . . £2.50
Access to support . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . £10.00
Bug in the soup……..included at no extra charge.
(will be fixed with Tomorrow’s soup of the day).