The way we do things in Kent

A London high flyer Solicitor went Pheasant shooting in Kent. He shot and dropped a bird, but it fell into a retired man’s garden.

As the Solicitor climbed over the fence, the elderly man went to him and asked him what he was doing. The Solicitor responded, “I shot a pheasant  and it fell into this garden , and I’m going to retrieve it.”

The old man replied, “This is my property, and you are not coming over here.”

The indignant Solicitor said, “I am one of the best contract Solicitor’s in London, if you don’t let me get that pheasant, I’ll sue you and take everything you own.”

The old man smiled and said, “it’s apparent, you don’t know how we do things in Kent. We settle small disagreements like this with the Kent Three Kick Rule.”

The Solicitor asked, “What is the Kent Three-Kick Rule?”

The man  replied, “Well, first I kick you three times and then you kick me three times, and so on, back and forth, until someone gives up.”

The young Solicitor thought about the proposed contest and decided that he could easily take the old codger. He agreed to abide by the local custom.

The old man slowly walked up to the Londoner. His first kick planted the toe of his heavy work boot into the Solicitor’s groin and dropped him to his knees. His second kick nearly wiped the man’s nose off his face. The Solicitor was flat on his belly when the farmer’s third kick to the kidney area nearly caused him to give up.

The Solicitor summoned every bit of his willpower and managed to get to his feet and said, “Okay, you cranky old git! Now, it’s my turn!”

The old man grinned and said, “Nah, I give up. You can have the pheasant it’s over there by the Geraniums!”