General Archive

One sale on first day.

Posted August 15, 2018 By Exocet

A young guy from a small country village moves to the big City and goes to a big “Everything under one roof” department store looking for a job. The Manager says, “Do you have any sales experience?” The kid says “Yeah. I was a vacuum cleaner salesman back in my village.” The boss was a […]

     

Face slap in a train carriage.

Posted August 31, 2015 By Exocet

A Glaswegian, an Australian, a Nun and a attractive woman sit on a train. The lights in their car are defective consequently in every tunnel it gets really dark. The train drives through a tunnel, it gets dark and suddenly you hear a slap and someone cries out in pain.

     

7 dwarves visit the Pope at the Vatican.

Posted August 26, 2015 By Exocet

The seven dwarves went to the Vatican and when the Pope answered the door, Dopey stepped forward. “You’re Excellency,” he said. “I wonder if you could tell me if there are any dwarf nuns in Rome?” “No, Dopey, there aren’t,” the Pope replied.

     

Bic Lighter

Posted March 1, 2015 By Exocet

A guy walks into a bar, sits down next to another guy and immediately notices the guy has a very large Bic cigarette lighter.

The first guy says “Wow, cool lighter… where did you get it?”

     

Brass rats n pigs.

Posted January 1, 2015 By Exocet

“That will be £10 for the brass rat and £1,000 for the story behind it,” said the proprietor. “Thanks, but I’ll just pay the £10 and pass on the story.”

     

Dover man, Genie and Europe.

Posted October 21, 2014 By Exocet

One day a Dover man was walking along the beach and found a very odd looking bottle, he picked it up and opened it. A genie appeared and thanked the man for letting him out. The genie said, “For your kindness I will grant you a wish, but only one.”

     

Unbelievable Act in Public.

Posted February 18, 2013 By Exocet

I couldn’t believe what I saw outside my window!   I had to zoom in, no one in their right mind would do such a thing. yes I think I know what they are doing, it’s unbelievable they are doing this, but let’s be sure.   Yes I know it, I’m almost convinced at what […]

     

Just not cricket

Posted February 24, 2012 By Exocet

For their entire adult lives, Arthur and Peter discussed cricket history in the winter and they pored over every box score during the test match season.

     

Airport Calendar Girl

Posted February 15, 2012 By Exocet

We proudly present to you, airport pinup calendar girl.

     

Campfire caper.

Posted December 1, 2011 By Exocet

“I wrestled a grizzly with my bear hands and made it cry. “

     

How the fight started.

Posted December 1, 2011 By Exocet

When the wife came in, she was feeling very amorous.

     

Yoko in I’m a Celebrity get me out of here!

Posted December 1, 2011 By Exocet

It was reported that Yoko Ono is going to take part in I’m a celebrity get me out of here

     

A Special Recipe

Posted July 8, 2005 By Exocet

Sample the whisky to check for quality. Take a large bowl. Check the whisky again.

     

WAZUUUUP!

Posted March 8, 2004 By Exocet

Ali bin WAZZZUP!

     

Why? What?

Posted March 8, 2004 By Exocet

Why are there flotation devices under plane seats instead of parachutes? How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work in the mornings?

     

You’re a Sad GIT If…..

Posted March 8, 2004 By Exocet

You’re a Sad GIT If. If your spouse sends you an e-mail instead of calling you to dinner.

     

Signs your webmaster is in a cult.

Posted March 8, 2004 By Exocet

Signs your webmaster is in a cult.

     

Star Wars Get in there you big furry oaf, I don’t care what you smell! Luke, at that speed do you think you’ll be able to pull out in time? Put that thing away before you get us all killed. You’ve got something jammed in here real good. Aren’t you a little short for a […]

     

Famous Dickheads

Posted March 8, 2004 By Exocet

Famous Dickheads.

     

Millenium bug killer.

Posted March 8, 2004 By Exocet

The cost effective way to prevent Millenium bug problems.

     
Bear